Campers manual 1.0

Now, this manual start with assumption, that you dont use money (although i encourage spending some, it would make start so much easier), so this is really slow approach to the Mecha Galaxy. And by slow i mean months before “real game play” starts.

So, you got introduction part over. Now stop and dont click anything. You need recources, and you don’t want to buy for them. Go _Home - profile - harvest_ and then _home - quests - collect_. That’s all you got now, so lets figure out where to get more.

Main source for crystals is to harvest your own field or friends. And friends you get, when you go _base - honor guard - Join [this Facebook Group] to exchange Honor Guard links_. Go there and friend all and everyone who you can find in there. And do this again tomorrow. And day after that. In about week you have most of active ones for your friends list. You harvest them and they you, crystals emerge like magic. All benefits.

You harvest friends by _home - friends_ and then harvest one by one all there is. If you find crystal, please send seed when asked, so others can get extra crystals from them. And you get seeds when let others harvest your field. Seeds you use in _home - inventory - seed crystal - use item_. One month with active harvesting and you have couple thousand of crystals.

Now other recourses. Bioptics you get when you join every honour guard what you find in Mecha Galaxy Honor Guard page. And if you asked guard of your own, it get filled at same time. Again all benefits. Third needed is Ferrite. That you get when you fight. Now go _battle - higher_ and click higher so many times that level 30 are found. Next to attack button is tons, bigger is better. Fight with someone, if you lose hit same again until your fights run out. If you win, curse your bad luck and change target. This “use all fights” you do as often as you can, until you got enough ferrite (thats never gonna happen).

Niodes. At start just remember that you dont use any of them at any reason for anything. Save all. But niodes you get joining circuit in _battle - Circuit fights - enter_ after you are level 12. Before that you can get niodes by selling weapons which you win in King Of The Mountain (KOTM) in _events - sign up_, but both are DO NOT FIGHT zones, until you figure what you are doing.

Now. Main currency in game (for campers anyway) is xp (experience). You have little amount xp before you level up, and you really don’t want to do that. Not without good reason. Just trust me on this. But still, you need to level, so that you can buy mechs and with them you can win more stuff. So what level is good. If you want real challenge, go with level 5. At that, you get base with 6 slots. Level 10 you have base with 8 slots and level 12-19 9 slots.

My choice was level 8, mainly because mechs Axe Bot and Shocklite. But where to get xp so that you benefit most. For that my choice was missions, because you get ferrite, biobtics and niodes there. And if you are lucky, useful loot too. But you need good mechs to open missions succesfully. So first thing to do is _gifts - Instant Upgrade Kit_ and send one to all your friends, and then wait that someone send one back. Next thing is buy best mehcs you can, and level then as high as you can. Those Instant Upgrade Kits are ment to upgrade your niodes mechs (WarHorse at first), so you can save your niodes for better use. And for weapons there is _niodes - watch videos_. If you are lucky, you can fill your mechs with those, or you get none.

Now start really fun part. When your base is full of mechs and all upgraded max, you do first mission. That would be Pirate Moon. On that you do all minibosses until Cogwerk Port opens and then continue there (there is no boss fight in Moon, so just forget it after all minis done). If you level up, you stop to upgrade all and then continue. All mean weapons and equipment too. Level 3 WarHorse get first cockpit slot, so either buy crystal one right away, or wait discount and buy niodes one. Level 5 you can buy more WarHorses (or wait and get Axe Bots later) but they cost niodes so wait discount with them too.

Average cost to open Cogwerk Port is around 200xp and Vupa 6 around 600xp. More if you are unlucky. End fight is free, but it will take lots of time. So lets check other source of xp, battles. Every battle you win, will give you some amount of xp based on tons of opponents. So either hit level one players (and smallest tons there) or find opponents who use zero tons line (those are 1xp for every win). And then there is that KOTM, every win in there is 10xp, and to get something out of there, you need to fight (unless you joined early enough and are either tough or lucky enough to stay top 25 without fight).

So, now you know the basics how to become passable player. Manual 2.0 will go more in details and will result you to come good player. Of course there is 3.0, but thats for those who aim monsters…

Huijari Peli 
712166
Smurf Camp

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King of the Mountain News

#710713
Sports Desk – FMCL

Vol 1 No 4

Event: Classic 65

Well? How did you come out against the spread? Your favorite pilot come in first or do you owe your bookie the proverbial pound of flesh? Here’s the final tally for those of you who missed it.

Div 1 Justin Verret of Cyberstorm
Div 2 Jeff Haas of The Isle of Misfit Toys (MMI)
Div 3 Feng Jiang of Death’s Deisciples{AFF}
Div 4 David Jeang of Eridani Light Horse 151st Striker Rgmt
Div 5 Stephen Chen of 82nd Omicron Guard [ARC]
Div 6 Armored Core of DELTA RECON
Div 7 James Waddington of Exiles
Div 8 Baruch Judson Calkin of Exile’s Camp
Div 9 Nicholas Quesada of Eridani Light Horse 21st Striker Rgmt

Congrats to Eridani Light Horse and Exiles for picking up wins in two divisions.

For a complete listing of placement check the archive here:
https://mechagalaxy.gamecraftsmen.com/game/event_archives.game?event=182

Now we turn to our continuing in depth look at a few of the things that make the FMCL tick. This time we’ll focus on the very item that makes the KotM event possible: the mecha. This event is a classic 65 so let’s start with the stars in that category. The Smilodon and the Megazome are of course the best chassis (arguably) in this class. Both weigh in at 65 tons making them the biggest in the bracket and becoming available for purchase beginning in the Division 6 range these Niode base mecha are the kings of the event. As they are upgraded the Smilodon gains an advantage in cockpit and engine modifications available while the Megazome gains a relative advantage in chassis and shielding. The ancient poet, I believe he was called Spearshaker, even wrote a poem about the Smilodon:

The wonderful thing about Smilodons
is Smilodons are wonderful things
their tops are made of Ferrite
their legs are made of springs 
they’re trouncy, bouncy, flouncy, fun fun fun fun fun
but the most wonderful thing about Smilodons
is their great big effing guns

While we could debate at length the virtues of one versus the other, instead we focus this time on the workhorse, the common foot soldier, if you will of these middle weight events: the Oggun.
The Oggun has been getting a good bit of press lately. From the recent Oggun themed event, a pilot favorite for point mech, as mentioned in a previous episode, to a very visible and widely used machine in this event. The Oggun becomes available fairly early in the career of a mech pilot, usually around Division 7, depending on the event and is heavily used by virtually every major faction, clan, or lone wolf pilot. Its modest purchase price makes it readily available and in quantity to anyone with a keen eye on the crystal harvests. A relatively low upgrade cost along with strong armor keeps the Oggun in fighting trim as a “main army unit” well into Division 3 or even Division 2. 
As for equipment upgrades the Oggun can support dual fire control computers, three heavy chassis control units and three shielding at maximum. For an added bonus, the unit can be modified with equipment designed to fit on much bigger, up to 75 ton, mecha for those with deep enough pockets. For commanders newer to the events or in lower divisions the Oggun can easily use equipment stripped from lighter units. Units that in all likelihood the Oggun is replacing. All this equipment only leaves room for a single power plant leaving it a bit slower than its contemporaries. This lack of speed is more than compensated for by sheer fire power. Fully upgraded the Oggun’s built in targeting system not only devistates its opponent, but tracks and targets the second wave of enemy units dealing a respectable amount of damage to units that have not even made it to the line of battle. To make the Oggun an even more dangerous foe is its pin point accuracy and ability to find weak points in the enemy’s armor. The Oggun can be expected to do double the average damage of an identical weapon fired by another unit a whopping 60% of the time. And that, my friends, is just one reason why you will always see an Oggun, or many Ogguns, each and every time there is a middle weight event.

On a personal note I would like to point out that many competitors have renamed their point mech in honor of our fallen comrade. A fitting tribute to a worthy adversary and fellow lover of all things mecha. A touch of class gentlemen and I thank you.

Next issue Roaring Cannons

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Meet the Underpants Gnome

Christine got the call at 0430, and she was not a morning person. She was Information and Personnel Officer of the Defenders of Bunny. The Clan mostly called her Mama-Bunny. A good portion were her children, or clones of them, or adopted. The rest, well, she rode herd on them too. For the record, herding cats is tons easier than Bunnies.

It was another fight in the laundry room. Hendrik had Andries in a headlock, and seemed inclined to hold him there, which was reasonable considering the burning flare Hendrick had in his hand. They were brothers, and this laundry room seemed to bring out the worst in siblings, she had to separate her daughters Alyssa and Caitlyn arguing about stealing each other’s underwear. It was Jessica and Stephanie Now the Smith Brothers were at it.

“What the Hell is going on in here!” she shouted, firmly twisting the burning flare out of Andries hands. Gusty Gutz was standing in the far corner trying to hide his laughter.

The two brothers separated, pointed at each other and declared

“He keeps stealing my underwear out of the laundry!”

It was going to be that kind of day. She confined them to quarters, and began to prep a report for John, her husband/CO when Gusty caught her eye and said “Mama-Bunny, they may be taking it a bit far, but you know, all the pilots are bitching about it. Just underwear, not socks or shirts or anything else. I stay here with mine, and still lose them”

Socks stopped going missing? The house wight, or house spirit had been living in the dryers since forever, and usually stole one sock out of a set every week or so as its due. Since the Faction War, she did notice she had stopped losing socks. Hmm.
———————————————CO’s Office—————————
“So I had Mighty Beatrice” the Defenders of Bunny renegade AI “run a statistical analysis, and prior to Faction War 1, we were losing seven socks a week to the Sock Goblin. Since Faction War 1 we are down to 1 sock every six weeks, and a pair of underwear a day.”

John looked at his wife and swore. “You mean traded the Sock Goblin for an Underpants Gnome?” John shook his head and looked over at his XO Charles Newburn, who looked like something suddenly made sense.

“Hey boss,” Charles rumbled, “You know Harley has been bitching about some Smurfs be stealing his good socks. I think during Faction War, the Sock Goblin came with us to the Smurf Legion, and didn’t come back. The Underpants Gnome must have made the reverse trip, but I never heard the Smurfs say anything about it. Must have been one of the other Brother units”

John sighed, activated his comm. Implants. “Beatrice, send a data querry to all Bouncing Blue Brotherhood members about past history of lost underwear, disciplinary actions related to fights in the laundry room. Find me someone whose fights over laundry dropped, and let me know.”

The answer took less than a second. The Abominable Snowmen, brothers from the BBB had tried anger management classes, dedicated security officers, and even diluting their Hatoraide stock, all to no effect. Arrest rates dropped 38% after Faction War 1.

“There you go, the Defenders of Bunny sent a Sock Goblin to the Smurfs, and got a really angry Underpants Gnome from the Abominable Snowmen. If we swap dryers, it will just move. Is this something we need to act on? The Snowmen really seemed to be ready to murder each other, before Faction War.” John seemed happy the problem was defined.

Christine’s answer was swift and sharp, “The Snowmen have few women, you guys may not care much if your underwear goes, but our girls lose lingerie and someone is going to bleed!” Charles and John winced.

After dismissing his staff, John wandered down to the mech bay to think. He had a new Torrent he was trying to break in, but the damned thing was sluggish, skittish, lacking the grim dedication of Mad Dog (his Dreadnought) or the blazing rage of Red Fury (His Inferno). It seemed oddly spiritless. He had a Clan that was going to kill each other because of their Underpants Gnome, and a Torrent that didn’t want to kill anyone. He sat in the mecha bay thinking about his twin problems when Easter, one of the mech bay bunnies came over and hopped onto the bench. Looking at him with the sad look she adopted when her humans were slow on the uptake, she reached out, grabbed onto the hem of John’s underwear at the back, and jumped off.

“Hey!” John shouted as he got a surprise Rabbit wedgie, turning from looking at his spiritless Torrent, to the rabbit who was sprinting towards the laundry room, then turning to look at him, and thumping the ground in her alert pose.

“Holy Heimdall on a Rainbow Rail Cannon, Easter, that’s brilliant!” The solution was obvious.

The Defenders and Avengers of Bunny had seen many strange things over the years, but this would remain the strangest.

The Torrent walked to the edge of the mecha bay, and with its great foot, booted in the wall to the laundry rooms, oddly not setting off the alarms that had just been over-ridden. Opening the cockpit, the pilot clad only in underwear, and carrying bundles of the same, stalked down the mecha body to the floor, and began to make a trail of underwear from the mecha to his dryers.

He stood aside, and gestured for Knockers McGuinty, chief tech and all around go to girl, to begin blasting the dryers with liquid nitrogen, as Charles and Stephanie began a chant to drive the Underpants Gnome from his home, and into the Torrent. The growl of the formerly placid Torrent argued they had been successful, and grinning like idiots, the Bunnies gestured to their chief to mount up and go.

The Bunnies boiled out behind the chief in the Torrent. He stood alone in the front rank, and headed for the Abominable Snowmen, to test the new Torrent. Coming out the gate on Nasrat, he knew a moment pure joy, a pirate raid was happening!

There were pirates everywhere, Red Ants to Simildons, they were everywhere, looting, burning, and largely ignoring the silent Torrent charging in alone. With a roar broadcast on the hailing frequencies, the Torrent fired its first shot in anger, his great Creeping Chill flaring searing white as he targeted the leading Axebot

“Fork, Trample, Freeze; four at a time! Wedgie time you pirate scum, meet the Underpants Gnome!”

Spirit and flesh, man and machine, with a side of underwear; that is the recipe for success in this odd Mecha Galaxy.

John T Mainer
Defenders Of Bunny.

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Review of the Liquid Torch By Joseph Forsithe »

mechagalaxy:

I have yet to buy one but have won a few from Tory on Novum. I think they are great for free weapon but it is very hard to get anything else from her. The stats are tasty with 52 damage speed of 104 and it causes burn at 16%. While it is not the most powerful weapon in the game, it certain is one…

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Green Death: Love in Laserlight »

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image

Where were you the first time you fell in love with a gun? I was in Novum Dolorum, taking Nifthels and Holmes against Cindrons and Inferno. Avengers of Bunny had equipped me with a new laser, the Green Death. It was faster than my Sleet Storms and did a tiny bit more damage. I…

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Sever: Encounter with the Dark Hawk »

mechagalaxy:

Cogwork port had been good to us. We hit town running solid equipment, a mix of Nifthel and Holmes but with the upgrades that several successful campaigns made possible. Loot from our victories had left most machines with a special weapon or two that made us more deadly than our weight suggested….

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Bouncing Blue Brotherhood »

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The most important things in your life happen when you are in the middle of something that seemed important at the time. I was piloting for the Hierarchy of Angels, the only clan that would take a couple of Cogwork renegades turned Meijin Ronin. My daughter Alyssa had split from my lance, and…

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Darwin: Namtar of Natural Selection »

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Faction War 1: Smurf Legion Integration- Status; in progress.

“Welcome to the Smurf Legion Technical Corps, I am Knockers McGuinty, late of the Defenders of Bunny, now XO to Brainy Smurf here in the Smurf Legion Faction. Brainy isn’t so good with things you can’t take an arc welder to, so he…

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Darwin: Namtar of Natural Selection

Faction War 1: Smurf Legion Integration- Status; in progress.

“Welcome to the Smurf Legion Technical Corps,  I am Knockers McGuinty, late of the Defenders of Bunny, now XO to Brainy Smurf here in the Smurf Legion Faction.  Brainy isn’t so good with things you can’t take an arc welder to, so he leaves the people stuff to me.  As a result , he hasn’t been charged with attempted murder of a pilot in about two months.”

“I know you are wondering, how do we deal with the problem of dozens of new pilots, with cases of slight to serious pilot ego testosterone poisoning..  The answer is right here.”  Knockers gestured behind her at the looming Namtar with the raised Ferite letters “Darwin”.

“Meet Darwin,  the Namtar of Officer Natural Selecton”  Knockers smiled happily as she slapped the heavily scarred Namtar.  This was the creation of my father Two Tooth McGuinty, as a screening tool for Officers of the Defenders of Bunny.  I swore I would never resort to using him, but with the expansion, we have to vette too many pilots too quickly, and TC is a good way to eliminate the dangerous ones before they get good Smurf killed.”

The crowd of techs looked at the Namtar, noting that it was completely stripped.  Levelled up somewhere in the high twenties by the available slots, the mech clearly should have a great deal of equipment installed, and a huge slate of weapons. 

“Yup, this is the test.  Those too dumb to live, too stupid to listen naturally select themselves out of our hair.”  Knockers grinned, and the techs shared an quick evil chuckle.  There was shouting from across the mech  bay, and a new officer  strode across the bay.  Fresh in the new uniforms of the Smurf Legion BBB Faction, it was impossible to tell from which family he had come, but like all the new officers, he was now a Smurf, and her problem.

Knockers picked up a data slate and walked forward to the new officers and smiled

“Sir, welcome to the Smurf Legion.  I will be chief of your tech teams, Knockers McGuinty.  I am pleased to announce that a Command Mech is now open for officers who wish to upgrade from their medium mechs into a command Heavy.  Here is a dataslate with two possible configurations, and a technical breakdown of their performance and technical assesments?”  Knockers smiled her most devastating smile, but the new pilot had eyes only for the heavy mecha.

As he punched his way through the engine choices Knockers attempted to explain

“Yes that one is faster but..” The pilot cut her off with a grunt and moved to cockpit items

“Yes that is fast too but….” The pilot told her to shut up and do what she was told

The pilot moved swiftly to the weapon menu and Knockers again attempted to put the brakes on the new officer

“Now that may be a bit too powerful….”  That was as far as Knockers got before the pilot stopped her.

“Listen girly, you are a wrench monkey, a dirty little tech.  I am a pilot, one of the elite of the galaxy.  I am a command officer in this Faction, and you are a servant.  Do as you are told, or you will be replaced.  Do you understand?” 

Knockers smiled coldly, and bowed.  The officer stalked off.  With a flick of her fingers on the tab she pushed the officer’s choices onto the main bay screen.

 

Turning to the waiting techs, she smiled a carefree grin. “Shall we review the Namtar “Darwin” proposed configuration?”

“Quiz time ladies and gentlemen, the base kickback chance of a 27th level Namtar is?”

They chorused “15%”

“Add two Spinal Taps and a Plasma Bottle?”

Some quick mental math and a certain amount of finger counting later the answers tricked in “ Another 18%”

“Soldier bots are worth another….?”

The techs now getting into the spirt of the day cheered “Another 13%”

With a final gesture she pointe d to the weapons selected for the ridiculously overtuned mech,

“And what happens when we strap eight Neutralizer Cannon with a  pesky little 30% kickback of their own to this awesome flying bomb?”

The techs threw back their heads and cheered “BOOOOM!”

       Knockers pointed to Darwin the Namtar of Natural Officer Selection, and laughed.  “Lets get this noble officer’s ride together.  He has a date with destiny!”

John T Mainer 28840, Smurf Legion Faction BBB

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Jokers and Aces »

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“So it is confirmed, General Ito has backing for his coup?” The voice of the Emperor was mild and calm as he observed the Bonsai tree in his private gardens. From the shadows, the voice of his agent whispers in tones masked by implanted modulators.

“The Minister of the Left has gathered the…
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Not My Fault »

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Not My Fault

Incident Report: Lt Caitlyn Mainer, Defenders of Bunny: Novum Dolorum; 3299-03-22
Type of Incident: Friendly Fire
Severity: Oh, pretty bad. Killed maybe a hundred so far, and might be getting out of hand

For the record this is NOT MY FAULT! I was breaking in my new Cindron (Bronze…

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King Chrono Highlights »

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Sports Desk – FMCL

Vol 1 No 2

part two

Event King Chrono

The final bell has been rung and King Chrono is now in the record books. Not a lot of changes in the final day. This is one event where is pays to heed the advice on the sign up announcement. Sign up early and power your way to…

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King Chrono Highlights »

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image


Sports Desk – FMCL

Vol 1 No 2

part two

Event King Chrono

The final bell has been rung and King Chrono is now in the record books. Not a lot of changes in the final day. This is one event where is pays to heed the advice on the sign up announcement. Sign up early and power your way to…

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King Chrono Highlights »

mechagalaxy:

image


Sports Desk – FMCL

Vol 1 No 2

part two

Event King Chrono

The final bell has been rung and King Chrono is now in the record books. Not a lot of changes in the final day. This is one event where is pays to heed the advice on the sign up announcement. Sign up early and power your way to…

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Letters from the Front: Faction War 1

Letters from the Front:  Faction War 1

The war was going…..to be a real mother-fracker, that was the truth.  This made Clan War look like a Snavurm hunt, and the Clone War look like Sunday school.  Frack.  Sunday school; mom.  It’s funny the things you remember, and the things you forget.

Sitting here in my cockpit, the engines of my coal black Orester “Eight Ball”, watching the countdown sequence for jump, and all I can think about is the letter I promised to write my mother.  Stupid hey?  The boss has already hit the gate, my squad is third in echelon, so it’s time to move onto the tarmac.

I connect to the MIU; the Machine Intelligence Unit.  Together we are one.  Well, together we are more like a bucket full of crazy.  I am Lt Abdulraheem Mohammed, she is Eight Ball I/we are ready.

Write your mother

“Shut up Eight Ball, you can’t talk.  You aren’t real”  When I began my career with the Mechwarrior Clan, we were taught that the voice that some pilots reported hearing was an artifact of the human mind, and not actually the machine.  We were taught to tune it out.  When the pilots got drunk though, they told a different story.

Write your mother or I switch your weapons to simulator mode in the next battle.

“Eight Ball, I am your master, you are my slave.  Damnit, you are a glorified forklift with feet, a pistol with delusions of grandeur.  I am not letting my fracking bus tell me what to do”

The sound system in the cockpit snapped to instant life, the terrifying strains of the Smurf Legion war chant “La la, lalalala, la lalala-la”  in horrible sing-song began blasting at max volume.  It was keying through my mastoid implant as well, so my sound cancelling headphones were no bar.  I had Smurf music  playing in my bones, and would because my mech wanted me to honour my mother’s wishes and write her a letter.  Fine.

“Dictate letter, audio, and cut the Smurfing noise!”

Happy with my decision, the smurf song cut off, but it was stuck in my head now, and I think I was humming it.  Damned song.  Worst part about becoming a Smurf was the song.  Kind of catchy though, and it did cheer you up.  I needed it.  I served the Mechwarriors with honour, but when the Faction War erupted, we got crushed.  The AFF, RND, Highlanders, it began with them.  No longer content to contend as Clans, they banded together into actual no-drek armies.  The nations could have stopped it, maybe.  But then Ozland happened and  the RV followed, suddenly the other powerful clans began forming Factions of their own, and independent Clans were either wiped out altogether, or gated themselves off to west butt-munch to wait out the Storm.

We looked for friends.  We found them.  The Smurfs and Bunnies had long been allies, and the fact that they could serve together without being lost offered hope.  The Mechwarriors, Exiles, Heroes looked at their old enemies and rivals, and saw maybe a place to stand, and people to guard our backs.  I became a Smurf.  We became Smurfs of one division or another; The Blue Bouncing Brotherhood.  What a name.

The Smurfs and Bunnies accept the voices of the AI are real.  The Smurfs think its cool, the Bunnies think its spiritual, the Exiles think that crazy is part of the balance that makes success, and the Heroes……well they have some ideas about normal that just aren’t.  Still, having your mecha blackmail you to writing your mother was more acceptable in the BBB than among the saner groups.  That helps.

I can’t lie to mom.  I mean, I could, but she would see it on my face, and I would crack.  Dad is different.  Men don’t talk about their feelings.  We sit in stony silence accepting each other’s secrets, and protecting each other’s pride.  We love each other, but we just don’t SAY it.  It’s a man thing.  Mom needs to hear things, she needs to know its OK.  OK is…..different here.  This is Faction War.

*Blue 21, right flank penetration, 0891Easting 04188 Northing, medium to heavy.  Hold until relieved*

Showtime.  That was us.  I gave the order for my Crazy Eights to form on me, and pushed down the cut to the co-ordinates given.  We were heavy, so medium heavy should be no problem.  What do you tell your mother about Faction War?  In a given day during a Clan War I might fight a dozen times, during this war, I can fight three to four times that.  We lose people, we lose machines, we lose battles, we lose track.  Can’t say that.  Can’t say much.  Holy FRACK, it’s an Inferno!!

I trigger a full spread of my Goliath rack, hammering two score missiles into the Inferno, scattering a few warheads over the Ogguns on either side.  In return he hoses me down with fire.  Fire suppression systems kick in, and the internal alarm screams at me.  What the hell is happening?  What hit us?

“Mother In Law.  Additional Burn Damage.  System coping.  Recommend eliminate threat.  I burn Mohammed…I burn.”

Triggering my Tandem Bomb, I drop to one knee for maximum steadiness.  It pays off.  I score a critical hit on the Inferno, and strike the right flank Ogun as well.  My flankers now concentrate fire on the remaining Oggun.  Right, how to put that in the letter to mom?

“Dictate letter:  Dearest Mom, had some relatives drop in for a visit.  We went for a nice hike in the hills, but I got a bit of a burn.  We exchanged several gifts, but I think my gifts were more generous.  All the guests had a good time, but I will have to go see the clinic about the burn.  Don’t worry, there is no danger of me missing work”

Eight Ball grumbled happily.  As long as I was writing mother, he was happy.  He loved my mother, I guess he sees what’s in my head, he just sees it differently.  He might be a better son than I am, but his targeting skills suck niodes, and he has the sense of balance of a drunken Highlander juggling sheep.  Now there is a sight you don’t forget in a hurry.

+++Repair Bay, hours later+++++

There are bunnies everywhere.  Its hard to figure out how none of them get stepped on.  I think the Bunnies are even weirder than the Smurfs.  Still, petting the little things helps the shakes after you get shot out of your mech.  The feedback really  messes you up.  I sat here eating Smurfberries (no I don’t know what they are, and yes they do turn your poop blue) and petting the Bunnies while Eight Ball got patched up.  We got stomped on the sixth attack this morning.  5/6 and live, that’s a good day.   I can’t exactly tell that to mom.  Well, I guess you can, if you phrase it carefully.

Climbing back into the cockpit, I feel Eight Ball waking beneath me. New cockpit crystal replacing the ones shattered by the enemy Dread, matching the sealskin replacing the half of my cheek torn off when the missiles punched through, killing my targeting computer and comm center, but just about missing me.  Well, it’s all about grammar right?  I learned that reporting the loss of my first Anzu to a Snavurm trap on the Jungle Moon.

“Dictate Letter: The sun is definitely gone.  We had a bad storm here yesterday.  The rain was so bad it shattered the glass here at base, and I got soaked to the skin.  I got cut a little bit during the clean up, and we had to shut down work early.”

Eight Ball listened to what I said, and replayed the memory.

Incoming!  The missiles came out of nowhere.  Black Rain locked on my Orester for strike after strike.  The enemy Krampus was still exchanging shots with me, replying to my Goliath Rack with his Rail Cannon as we exchanged body blows, evenly matched, but the center enemy Dread kept adding his Black Rain against either me or Simmons on the other flank, and the extra hits were costing me.  *UGNN*.  I take a hit.  Cockpit is blown, I can’t see.  Blood is pouring off my face, mouth is filled with blood. Alarms are screaming.  I toggle off a shot from my Black Ice, but I can’t tell if I hit anything.  Eight Ball is lurching.  I slap at the eject button as the shock of another incoming guass slug shatters my Eminence Engine.  It is a race between my ejection system and the failure of the nuclear containment fields.  Will I live or die?  If I wake up, I will know.  Too much blood lost.  Passing out now.

It wasn’t a lie.  It wasn’t all that much truth either, but you don’t tell your mother these things.  I can’t stand the thought of her worrying about me.  Eight Ball grumbles beneath me.  He agrees.  In a battle, you can see all the mechs involved.  In a Clan War or Clan Raid you can track each other’s progress, and Command makes sure no one gets overwhelmed.  It is all under control.  This if Faction War.

The Great Powers, Illyria, the Shogunate, Cogwork can’t control this.  They pulled their troops back to the big production centres and slapped controls over the media.  This will be settled on the field.  This is  Faction War; a storm upon the stars, forged of ceremetal and hate.  There is no stopping, it, there may be no winning it, but by my ancestors, we will be fighting it all the way.

The Bouncing Blue Brotherhood; Heroes, Exiles, Bunnies, Mechwarriors and half a dozen others joined under the Smurf Banner. We will not let this civilization fall, as the great nations of the past let the first attempt at man’s civilization fall, like the Forerunners fell.

Exiting the mech bay, chewing a fist full of bacon washed down with Hatoraide, I wiped the grease off on my coveralls.  A little bacon to cover the blood stains.  Mom does not need to know every detail about my day.

“Dictate letter:  We are really coming together as a group.  I love the men and women that I am serving with.  The job we are doing is tough, but somebody has to do it.  I don’t know how much longer we will be on this particular mission, but General Gushwa is confident, and the Operations Officer Colonel Mainer says one of two positive outcomes is right around the corner”

Eight Ball grumbled.  “That’s not what he said”

“Eight Ball, that is exactly what he said.  His words were that we had committed everything to this last push, and that tomorrow would see us either covered in victory triumphant upon the field, or drinking in Valhalla because we fell in glory dead on it.”

“But that is NOT how you tell it to your mother.”

“End Letter; Got to go now, mom.  Really big meeting coming up at work.  Will be back home soon.  Your son Lt Abdulraheem Mohammed, Smurf Legion”

Ahead, the open field beyond the pass allowed the Legion to deploy abreast.  Hundreds of Mechs wide, the formation resembled less an army, and more a vast tidal wave of ceremetal and hate, across the field, a matching wave of glittering metal and mayhem rushed to meet them. Washing down my bacon with the last of my Hatoraide, I felt the kill-urge rising, the need to settle it, to see an end to this battle in death or victory, I don’t even care which.  Not anymore. Damn; I’m humming the Smurf song again.

There is a Storm lose in the Galaxy.  Faction War.

 

John T Mainer 28840

Smurf Legion.

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