Cloud of Doom Review By Joseph Forsithe


The cloud of doom is a missile weapon that hurts bad when hit by it. It does 55 damage and has a speed of 99 which is fast for missiles. It splashes at 20% and has X3 damage at 4%. When i add it to my Inferno, you splash and burn and hit for 3 times damage. How can you argue with that? If you are a missile person, this is possibly the best missile to have!


Play: Mecha
Play on FaceBook:
Read all news:
Get Free Niodes: Submit your story

Clan Wars 17 Post War Interview with Steven Vreeland

Justin)-So Steven what was your opinion of this clan War?

Steven)-I think its a good way to get everybody to fight people in and around their level range and this clan wars were especially tougher for my clan, but we pulled though and pulled out a win.

Justin)-that’s great. Did you have fun doing it? How about the Beta test of the Raid?

Steven)- that was certainly new for the game My clan and I definitely had fun we communicated well and that’s how we pulled through to win And as far as the raid is concerned, I liked the idea, but it was hard to do, along with all the exp earned through the fights were not worth only having a chance at those weapons and gear. 

Justin)-I can see that.

Steven)- I only got a smoothebore myself, though I did kill enough to qualify for everything.

Justin)-Is there anything you’d like to see added to the game?

Steven)-I think it would be cool to do a raid after every clan wars, however to scale the amount of mechs and their difficulty down, so that the lower leveled players might also be able to participate without wasting xp and time.

Justin)-you’re not the first to suggest that. I think it would be cool myself, as it could be a chance for extra goodies for everyone, but it does need some tweaking still. looking forward, does your clan have any plans for the coming year?

Steven)-continued growth, along with continuing to help newer player grow and get accustomed to the game, our main goal is to help a couple of new players understand the basics of the game.

Justin)-a noble goal to be sure. It wasn’t easy learning this game back when this version started. Thankfully now there’s people out there to help the newcomers. Any final thoughts for our readers out there?

Steven)-keep fighting because no matter how down your clan seems in a fight the can always work together and get right back into the fray.

Justin)-Excellent advice. Thank you for your time Steven.

Steven)-no problem, thanks for conducting this interview.

Play: Mecha
Play on FaceBook:
Read all news:
Get Free Niodes: Submit your story

Post Clan Wars 17 Interview With Robert Goetz

Im here with Robert Goetz. Leader of Deaths BattleForce. Robert, You guys took bronze in the event. Did the new specialist format help you attain your place or hinder your place in the war?

Robert)-neither really…the top 2 clans in D1 are so far above the rest couldn’t compete with them, and the other..was there for the prizes alone I guess, I liked it as a change up…but would like to do it all the time.

Moe)-I see. So you like the format. From what i have heard, its about 50/50 on how people feel about the new format. Do you feel you were completly prepared for the new format?

Robert)-no not really was on vacation so didn’t really have much time online to do all the tweaking on my formations as I would have liked, but it did give me the chance to get some of my KOTM formations updated…

Moe)-How many specialties did you run, and did you minimize the changes to your lineup, or try for maximum bonus from your choice?

Robert)-I tried to Max out what I thought I could get over what I’ve seen from others in KOTM…not everyone for example at my level have a completely leveled fleet of ants or anuz…so that I knew would be one of my better formations…and also allowed me to let my teammates to pick other formations they were better in, instead of forcing them to be one of their weaker ones. If players are smart they look at the enemies profile, see where they got gold, top 10-25 in kotm so they know if they might have a chance at beating them in thier specialty, because testing in this type of format was limited.

Moe)- Agreed, thats what separates the boys form the men. Thank you for your time Robert. And Im sure we will see you right back here for Clan Wars 18!

Robert)-yes…Death as always will ever be present!!

Play: Mecha
Play on FaceBook:
Read all news:
Get Free Niodes: Submit your story

Div #4 Round 3 After Round Report With Whitney Averill

The Omegas (74) vs ~Heros~ (109)

FINALLY, an opponent that did his homework and the extra credit (which is why they won). They started when the bell rang, and try as we might, The Omegas repeatedly close their lead, but never over took them.
Analysis of battleroms showed where we failed, and how they won by using the rules to their advantage. However, that reason is classified ULTRA by order of the Clan leader, and will not be available for dissemination.

We tip our helmets to you, ~Heros~, and your winning stratagem. Congrads to you, from us.

Whitney Averill, player ID# 289061
Alpha of The Omegas.

Play: Mecha
Play on FaceBook:
Read all news:
Get Free Niodes: Submit your story

Crabs and Bunnies: Clan Raid XVII

Charles Newburn had been doing a the Lion’s share of the Bunny wall breaking. With the chief vowing to stand aside and let the Defender’s juniors maximize their loot, the duty of hitting the heaviest opposition was fallen only on him. His mind burned from fatigue poisons and the feedback of systems pushed too long. Stim packs had left his mouth tasting of metal and blood, come to think of it, there was some blood. He swigged from the horn of sweet honey mead and tore of a strip of bacon from his emergency rations.

His HUD had been flashing, now it just went away. He querried his AI and it replied in what sounded like Old Norse. He banged on it until the language shifted, and got Meijin Japanese. Keying his implants he heard the moaning of his great Antithesis Helverger was chanting its death chant, and he realized all of his weapons were offline, and two of his reactors were critical, the rest were suggesting emergency shut down. He looked at the pass, and saw rank after rank of Jadoon, the great Crablike mecha topping the weight limit of existing mech designs. Only he and the chief could face them, and he needed to return to base.

“Hammer to Asgard, I am Skosh coolant, TIC, Jaddoon.”
Translated from battlecode into civilian; Charles to base, I may just have enough reactor coolant to get back to base without exploding, I have teams in contact with 90 ton crab mecha.

“Roger Skosh coolant. Return to base. Code Sleipnir” 
Translated from battle code; get home before you blow up, the Chief will take care of it.

Charles limped his reeling machines back towards the gate, passing John’s lighter but still fearsome lineup stalking the other way.
“Hey boss, solid Jadoon, two ranks I can see. Not newbies either, battlescarred vets every one.”

The chief’s image appeared on his screen, then split, merged, split and turned green. Maybe he had left it a bit long, even his video was going……

“Got it in the bag. Knockers set me up with the ultimate Jadoon hunting equipment. Swapped out a Betrus Processor for it!”

Charles couldn’t think of any cockpit equipment specific for Jadoon hunting, and he knew he was going to regret asking…..”What equipment?”

John flashed the picture of what looked like the bastard child of a coffee urn and cockpit cup holder. An open flame from a candle lit the bottom of a strange yellow liquid… way… couldn’t’ be….

“I swear Charles, you just can’t go Crabbing without melted butter!”

They both laughed loud and long. Before he made it through the gate, the death screams of Jadoon pilots echoes in his ears. Charles laughed. They should have run when they smelled the butter.

John T Mainer 28840
Defenders of Bunny

Play: Mecha
Play on FaceBook:
Read all news:
Get Free Niodes: Submit your story

Proto Beam
Damage 3 Speed 101
Effect: 2X Damage 10%
This weapon is possibly almost useless. While it has double damage and is more powerful than the Viper laser this gun is often replaced at the same time as the other weapon. even when the effect kicks in any higher level laser will do more damage. I suggest you pass this one up.

Sean White 690365

Play: Mecha
Play on FaceBook:
Read all news:
Get Free Niodes: Submit your story

Smurf Free or Die!

Daniel  Pokeshifter Konsdorf ID# 697678

To all human peons of the forerunner scum: You have given up our humanity by siding with one who desires our enslavement. We shall hunt you as clans and individuals. Any caught siding with that scum shall perish in a storm of weapons fire. No quarter shall be given. If you attempt to control me, know this: I have outfitted my mecha to self destruct if need be. You shall not enslave me. the SMurfs and Bunnies shall never fall to some scumbag hasbeen from the past. You shall perish. Your master shall perish. This is a promise from a proud Smurf.

Play: Mecha
Play on FaceBook:
Read all news:
Get Free Niodes: Submit your story

A Day in the Life

“Welcome to ANN’s A Day in the Life, I am Steve Schindler. We are speaking today with Aria Airhead of the Smurf Batallion. Welcome to ANN Aria”

“It’s an honour ANN decided to pick me for their feature of A Day in the Life, for mecha pilot. I really liked your work last month on Madame Ylong and her work with crystal Bonsai gardens. I know that there are a lot of misconceptions about mecha pilots out there, because I used to have them too!”

Steve smiles and glances at the hovering holocamera. “So you weren’t raised in a pilot family”

The coltish blonde laughs happily and tosses her hair. “Gosh no. Mom is VP for Galactic Ops for Stellar Flow Aircars. The expectation was that I would go on to follow her footsteps as an executive with Stellar Flow. Because of her position, we always had a bodyguard lance to protect us from pirates and organized crime kidnap attempts. I guess you could say I fell in love with mecha watching them stride along beside our Stellar Flow Stretch limousines.”

Steve nodded “So your mother got a position with the Smurf Battalion for you when you decided to become a pilot, and financed your initial mecha?”

Aria stopped and turned. “Oh no! Mom cut me off without a niode. Our bodyguard lance was from OG Mechwarriors, and she warned them that if they so much as loaned me a Red Ant they would never work for Stellar Flow again. Besides, I still can’t pilot anything big enough for the OG Mechwarriors. The Smurfs took me in when I won my first Warhorse, and the rest has just been due to my ability to make friends and shop wisely. Its all about making friends and shopping.”

Steve looked confused. “What about fighting?”

Aria looked serious for a second. “We do go to war occasionally, and that is very serious. But most of our days are basically spent keeping in touch with friends, baking, and shopping.”

Steve looked deeply confused “Baking and shopping hardly sound like pilot skills!”

“Well Steve, let me start by showing my baking routine.”

Moving into the Smurf Kitchen, he saw Arai preparing huge loads of odd blue muffins (Smurfberry?), and whole grills full of bacon, and Snavurm strips.

Steve stole a piece of bacon, and offered Aria one. She shook her head and frowned.

“I am a vegetarian Steve, the bacon is part of the secret economy of Mecha Galaxy, not the black market, everyone knows about that, the bacon market. Bacon and muffins wins wars. We were taught that by the Defenders of Bunny and the Omegas. Of course, they didn’t have chocolate Smurfberry muffins, so we have taken it to the next level.”

“Now we go shopping”

Down in the mech bay, they came to Aria Airheads station, where eight gleaming Imechs with BBB: Smurf Batallion, Airheads Squadron markings. At their head was the scariest mech he had ever seen. Like a massive spider it was twice as wide as the Imechs, and nearly as tall. Brisling with cannons and odd sensor eyes, it had the name “Creepy-Crawley” painted between peace signs on the cockpit. Aria helped him to climb the legs, and up the chain to the cockpit, as she exchanged friendly greetings with her lance mates.

Chatting happily about making friends and shopping, she marched her Fides and squad of Imechs through the jump gate. What followed next was the most bizzare day Steve had yet seen.

“We are just dropping in on some friends to pick up some crystal. Need to have a little cash to go shopping right? And besides, we don’t talk enough.”

At each stop she would either exchange seed crystal and a muffin for some spending crystal, or if they had no crystal, she would attack. Without any warning at all, her weapon systems came live, and the Fides gave a growl.

“Oops, no crystal today Calvin?” She chirped cheerfully
“Bite me Blue girl. You aren’t Smurf enough to take it” came the reply.

A spread of missiles hammered the Fides, and Steve screamed. In return Aria laughed maniacally and cut loose with green and purple lasers, followed by a long rumbling roar. The green lasers and cannons bracketed the enemy Holmes, but the purple lasers punched right through, taking off the main gun arm.

“Don’t you love the Cheops beams? I picked them up during the Clone Wars, and they are like, so pretty and purple. Cut through armour like a debutant at a shoe sale too!”

The Fides lurched under the impact of heavy guass rounds, but the eight legged mech was hard to knock over, and swarms of little nanites crawled over the cockpit healing the systems that cracked under the impact. Steve screamed again as the wave of tiny nanintes crawled across him to get to the sparking console.

“Aren’t they sweet?” Chriped Aria. “ I mean, how can you not put creepy crawleys in Creepy Crawley?” “And if you are going to lead from the front, you need to have staying power. My little nanobots keep my baby in fine form” Looking at the greenish tinge of the reporter she handed him an airsick bag.

After a few more exchanges, the other mechs were reduced to so much scrap metal, and Aria opened the cockpit. Climbing down she carried a tray of Smurfberry muffins and bacon. Chatting happily with the pilots she had just crushed, she and her pilots helped them get their mechs put back together, and in return they loaded up her mechs with Ferrite and Biopics. Before they left, Aria and Calvin shook hands and laughed, exchanging tokens.

“Aria, I’m confused. Aren’t you enemies?”

Aria looked shocked. “Steve, how could you think that? Didn’t you just see us exchange honour guard tokens? Calvin and I are friends. He thought his Holmes were tougher than my Imechs, but he just can’t accept that Creepy Crawley is enough of an equalizer. I swear we do this once a week. This was just a little catch up with old friend.”
“Now we go shopping”

Steve looked confused. “Where?”

“Vupa 6!” Aria said happily.

“But that is filled with pirates!” Choked Steve

Aria turned and looked at him with big wide eyes, “But Steve, how are we going to keep the Galaxy safe, if we don’t stop the scourge of piracy?” Batting her lashes, and smiling cheerfully. “And they have all kinds of cool stuff. Lets go get some”

+++++Hours later, 280 mechs killed +++++++++

Steve is sobbing like a schoolgirl told prom was cancelled, and Aria was wide eyed and snarling like an axe wielding berserker from some bad Viking holodrama.

“Quit your snivelling and hand me a Stim-Pack bitch” Aria snarls as they stride from the fire. The cockpit is filled with smoke and the beeping of alarms. The nanobots are sluggish in the heat, and reapair is not happening with the accustomed speed. The six legged mech is lurching like a drunk and Aria was laughing madly.

“Die you twisted freaks, Die!” Aria laughed and laughed, hanging off her cockpit straps as her Panther Wheel snarled and chewed its way through an opposing Fides. Steve could not believe this was the same Aria Airhead.

“Use the extinguisher to cool off the nanobots before the reactor breach blows us up.” Aria snapped, slapping overload alarms with both hands as she used her foot pedals to shift the burning mecha to the side, narrowly avoiding one of the final two pirates attempt to pin her with cannon fire.

“what, wha?” Steve whined, utterly lost in the madness of battle

Aria turned and pegged her passenger with an empty stim can in the forehead, four more littered the mech, and two big two liters rolled along the floor as well.

“Spray the console mother-fracker or I swear I will shoot you before we blow up!” Her eyes were wide and wild. The wide innocent blue eyes transformed into ice rimmed windows into the abyss, twin madness born windows into some icy northern Hel. He took the extinguisher, and fumbling, sprayed CO2 all over the cockpit, the icy charge cooling and activating the repair nanobots as they struggled to rebuild the reactor containment circuitry, already on its way to critical overload.

The alarms went silent, and with a final lurch, the struggling Fides salvoed off a Large Fury Rack at the lone reeling pirate mech, sending it crashing to the ground. Aria threw back her head and howled like some late night Tri-Vid werewolf over its first kill, and Steve passed out in fear.

++++++ Hours later, Vupa 6, Herrod’s Compound ++++++++++++++

Steve woke up to the smell of bacon and baked goods, and the relaxed laughter and voices of a crew taking a much needed break. Aria Airhead was looking at him with the same sweet flower child expression as before the raid, her wide open eyes showing her concern for her guest. His eyes focused on her tie dyed shirt; Give Peace A Chance. It was covered with crumbs, Smurf berry juice, sweat, stim juice, and blood. The pilots were washing down their Smurfberry muffins and bacon with what smelled like some sort of blue honey liquor (Smurfberry mead?). Aria the vegetarian was washing down her muffin with some sort of evil looking green herbal shake (looked like Snavurm poo).

“How can you live with war like that?” He asked in a shaking voice?

The collected pilots all burst out laughing. Aria finally gave the frightened reporter a big hug, and with tears streaming down her laughing face, she patted him on the back and told him the gods honest truth.

“Oh honey that isn’t war, that was shopping! War gets too intense to bring ride alongs.”

Steve just shook as the realizations sunk in, she was dead serious. This was just a normal day in the life. Turning to his holocamera he rasped out an end to the report.

“This is Steve Schindler with ANN News. I hope you enjoyed A Day in the Life of a mech pilot here in this Mecha Galaxy.” He looked at Aria Airhead still making Peace signs at the camera and smiling,

John T Mainer 28840

Play: Mecha
Play on FaceBook:
Read all news:
Get Free Niodes: Submit your story

Post Clan Wars 17 Interview with Yan Laflamme

Ladies and gentlemen, please help me welcome at this time, Yan Laflamme of Death’s Curse {AFF}. Yan, In this new format, you guys brought home the gold. Do you think it was more your strengths in the specialists format or your opponents weaknesses?

Yan)-for the last battle was easier cause or opponent took only the weapon specialist, everyone in the clan know who they can beat with the KOTM, our biggest fight wich continu in overtime was against Stirling those guys were hard, lost of smaller tonnage specialist, always harder to know who can or cant beat. but D win was a great help too.

Moe)-Agreed, those lighter tonnage guys can be a pain….specially those blasted Red Ants. 50/50 at best! How did you like this format? Would you be opposed to doing it again?

Yan)-It was a nice new format, I would like to do it again in few month, the thing I didnt really like was the fact that someone can attack you if you change your line-up, before you make a attack and also after the fight 2min I think, I would have love that before the battle the set-up was done, and you will have this set-up against all attack you receive. So you could change your line-up to attack anytime you want during the battle without any fear.

Moe)-I see your point there Yan. Did you feel your preparation gave you any advantage over your opponents? Or was it still pretty much the outcomes you predicted?

Yan)-I dont think my preparation give me any advantage, everyone made it for what I’ve found, it was still the overall power of every clan, weaker player could hide themself with 10 tons max lol but I’ve predict a huge battle with Stirling and that’s what happened.

Moe)-Agreed and a great battle it was! Okay, Anything to add before i let you go celebrate your Division 5 win?

Yan)-Thx to all the clan who fought in the CW, Congratz to all Gold Winner, thx to all AFF member really love that group of players,  wish you the best of luck for the Clan Raid and see you next war!

Moe)-Well there you have it folks! Thanks for stopping by and best of luck to you guys in your raids as well!

Play: Mecha
Play on FaceBook:
Read all news:
Get Free Niodes: Submit your story

Post Clan Wars Interview With Joseph Forsithe

Welcome to the set of ANN LIVE Joseph. Great showing out there! Silver medal! Was that what you expected or was not winning a gold a let down?

Joseph)-Thank you for having me. It is always a let down when you dont win but i knew 82nd Omicron would win. They have been there for a long time and hard to beat. Silver was what i thought for my clan and is what happened so not let down.

Moe)-Thats good Joseph. What are your thoughts on the new format?

Joseph)-It was good. Not something i want every time though. I gave up no wins against my lineup so was good but hard to beat their setups because they have been around longer than most at their current level.

Moe)-How do you feel you and your clan did as a whole?

Joseph)-I think we did well, maybe even better than we expected but hard to say being this was first Clan Wars like this.

Moe)-Do you think you guys will make any ground for the next war and take gold?

Joseph) I dont know. Hard to tell. Many things can change between then and i cant say but i know we will always do our best and play smart.

Moe)-Well, there you have it folks. Go enjoy your silver medal and we’ll catch you again next Clan Wars.

Play: Mecha
Play on FaceBook:
Read all news:
Get Free Niodes: Submit your story

Post Clan Wars 17 Interview With Scott Abbott

Welcome to the show Scott Abbott. You are the next contestant on ANN LIVE! Grats on Gold! You guys fought hard! How did you like the new format?

Scott)-It was interesting, a lot preparation and planning. Even more so than usual. In the end we had some really good close matches, was a lot of fun.

Moe)-I bet! It was fun watching you guys round by round. Were there any surprises for you and your clan?

Scott)-Disciples didn’t have many surprises really, Curse had fun with the OT win with Stirling. Was a fun close fight with Zeon, as always.

Moe)-Indeed. Zeon is a tough nut to crack but you seem to have their number now. Is this format something you would want to do again?

Scott)-sure, I think everyone learned a lot.

Moe)-Indeed, It will be a lot of work going forward as well, moving mechs and upgrading and yadda yadda. Personally, how do you feel you did in this war?

Scott)-about as good as I expected. I did not get to use any of my special formations for points really.

Moe)-I see. Well, ive taken about enough of your time. Go enjoy that gold with your guys. Stanks for stopping by ANN!

Scott)-Thanks Moe, Grats on your Gold as well!

Play: Mecha
Play on FaceBook:
Read all news:
Get Free Niodes: Submit your story

Post Clan Wars 17 Interview with Randy Taylor

Hello everyone! What an exciting Clan Wars! Im here with Randy Taylor of Exiles Evolution. Randy, that was some fierce fighting out there. You all came up a bit short in the Gold medal round but I really admired the way you all took it to the 82nd.

Randy)-yes it was a very exciting match we enjoyed the challenge of fighting the 82nd and look forward to another match in the future. I would like to congratulate them on a hard won victory.

Moe)-Indeed! This format was a tricky one. Did you find it to be an advantage or disadvantage for your guys?

Randy)-It was an advantage for the most part. but some clans were admittidly more prepared than we were one of those being the 82nd.

Moe)-Ah, Yes. They seemed to be a bit better prepared, but i was surprised that it was as close as it was. Everyone knows they are a tough team to beat and you guys have basically cone out of nowhere to be a force to be reckoned with. Im looking at the stats and i see a lot of Attack losses for you guys. Gamble shots?

Randy)-yea we figured we may as well give it our all if we were gonna take on the 82nd toward the end some shots were calculated some not admittedly but the best way to learn is experience so i figured we may as well go all out if we were taking on the 82nd.

Moe)-Going out in a blaze of glory! I LOVE IT! Would you be opposed to doing this format again?

Randy)-No i enjoyed it once the initial “omg i have so much to do to prep for this !!!” moment was over. Would gladly do it more often! I would like to see them do the clan wars we have had lately in a rotation that would be cool faction wars every 3 months and rotate the others in between would be great.

Moe)-Agreed, that is my thoughts. I would like to some other types as well but we will leave that up to the powers that be. Well thanks for coming by Randy. Gratz on silver! Well earned.

Randy)-yup thank you too for being up on the latest news and info in the game u make things way more interesting here for us players keep up the hard work.

Moe)-There you have it folks! See you next time on A.N.N. LIVE!

Play: Mecha
Play on FaceBook:
Read all news:
Get Free Niodes: Submit your story

King of the Mountain of Speculation: Ogguns and Aliens

 For Mycroft Holmes, #710713
… and now we turn to the financial report where the big news out of the Hegemony is booming sales of military hardware. For an in depth look we turn to Jason Travers.

Thanks Steve: this is Jason Travers A.N.N. Financial news here with a representative of the House of Stategoi, who for reasons of security cannot be show on live feed. Can we get a graphic of the logo for Stategoi? Yes, thank you. Mr. representative, it has come to our attention the sales and pre orders for your Oggun class war mecha have skyrocketed in the last few weeks. According to our figures calculated from your recent stock holders meeting sales have increased by over 600% and orders are coming in faster than your factories can fill them. In fact, we at A.N.N. Had our security services place an order for one and was told it would take 3 to 4 months for delivery. Your factory’s information networks claims they can manufacture “ over a hundred a day”. That is quite a large back order. What do you attribute to this amazing increase in sales?

Representative:” People recognize and appreciate quality”

Jason:” Thats it? Quality? What about the reports of the Forerunners return, this Drochah oh-Thyehgr, who claims he has come to enslave the galaxy? Does the threat of invasion help boost orders?”

R: "This “Forerunner” business is manufactured news to increase YOUR sales. Sensationalist reporting and propaganda, nothing more."

J: So you think there is nothing to fear? There is no impending invation?

R: "Your so called news agency has many times reported threats and invasions to boost your sagging ratings. What about this “King of the Pirate Moon” you have reported on? Not one shred of evidence to prove he even exists. And the “Clone Invasion”? That never materialized. This Dr. Drake you post wanted posters of is a veterinarian who works in our nature preserve." 

J: I see. And the fact that the newest martial games, The King of the Mountain, is this time featuring the Oggun as its center piece. A mecha in which your own brochures tout as “the heaviest armored for its class” and “ the epitome of durability and survivability on the battlefield”. This event is not a trial run? A readiness test for the militaries across the galaxy?

R:” The martial games are planned months in advance. You are trying to create connections where none exist. This is simply the culmination of a well planned and executed marketing campaign.”

J: Marketing? I’m sorry, you have me at a loss. The House of Strategoi has never used a marketing campaign before as far as I know. Can we have someone in studio check the sponsors for the latest event? Ah, yes, there it is. Boy, you really have to squint to see it down in all the fine print there. So, Mr. Representative, what is this new marketing strategy? Do you have a slogan? A catch phrase?


J: Oh, good. Um… would you like to share it with our viewers?

R: “Ogguns are practical”

J: That’s it?

R: "I preferred our old slogan."

J: I can’t wait to hear this…

R: “When collateral damage is not a concern”

J: You are a truly frightening individual.

R: “Thank you.”

J:I didn’t mean that as a compliment. Do you have anything you wish to add?

R: "Don’t believe everything… correction, don’t believe anything reported by the media."

J: Yes, well thank you for your time Mr. representative. This is Jason Travers, A.N.N. Financial reports, back to you in the studio, Steve.

Play: Mecha
Play on FaceBook:
Read all news:
Get Free Niodes: Submit your story

Grog, Gold, and Goblins

Brian Kelley 
CLAN: Smurf Brigade


Clan War XVII – Specialists

Bang, bang, bang….
Bang, bang, bang…

“What is it?” looking at the clock through very blurred eyes, which shows it at 2 am, I think.

“Corporal Jasmine, Sir!” officially sounding, but faint feminine voice through the metal door.

Corporal Jasmine, who? My mind being sleep, drunk fogged and not responding to current stimuli, is slowly coming to reality…

Bang, Bang, Bang that persistent knocking; hopefully it will go away, “Sir? Are you awake? Have a very urgent message from HQ!” She exclaims worriedly.

Suddenly, like a freight ship, crashing on my sleepy dreaming, whispering curses while drunkenly jumping up in a hurry. That Jasmine, damn it!

Crashing down goes the lamp I tried to turn on, falling down goes me after it, and trying to turn on that aforementioned lamp, getting into my jumpsuit, and then wrestling with a chair. Why the hell is that chair there!? What in hell is going on?

Jasmine knocks more hurriedly, noticing the many different crashing, cursing, and stomping noises coming from within.

“Sir?” she calls pleadingly, “Is everything ok?” after hearing a particularly load bang, glass smashing, and then the sound of someone stumbling…

I finally make it to the door after getting back up tripping over my boots, evil chair and open it, not realizing I had put on my jump suit inside out and still open in the front (couldn’t find the zipper, damn that infernal device!) With a comical, disheveled appearance, I finally present myself to Jasmine with a drunken smile.

“Ok, I am awake now, what in the nine hells could be that important at this time in the morning?” as my head is now finally clearing, somewhat, and where that second banging noises is coming from. Like some midget got inside an empty, metal barrel with a sledge hammer and gleefully pounding away from the inside out.

I quickly put my hand to my mouth to prevent certain stomach contents from suddenly making their putrescent appearance and my face turning a particular shade of olive green. I gasp for a second and bend my head lower to hopefully let out that damned, drum pounding midget and/or not to hit Jasmine with vomit (not sure which will happen first.)

“But Sir,” she barely holding back giggles and dodging potential stinky, chunky, liquid stream, “It is 2:30 pm”

“Huh?” is all my reply, despondently looking for a place to hide and puke.

“Here is the transmission we received from HQ, and that must have been one hell of a party yesterday.” She says confidently.

All I could do is grunt, shaking my head to clear it again, and painfully reach out and attempted to grasp the message envelope.

This of course, set me into a gravity assisted fall into which the hard floor received me, such a cold hard embrace it gave! Somewhere in the distance, I swear I can hear laughter, but at the moment, really, all I can see is Jasmine staring down at me with a very pretty, comical grin on her face.

“You are pretty, “I say with a slur, “Who are you again?” I ask wonderingly.

She laughs and says, “Jasmine,” for the hundredth time. “What was in those drinks ye had yesterday?” She asks curiously.

“You should not have gotten into that drinking contest with Captain Baxter!” She says reproachfully.

“What?” is all I can do or say. The view down here is marvelous; Jasmine definitely has some curves on her!

“Who?” I reply confusedly. Somehow, being flat on my back is very comforting.

Jasmine is trying to get me to stand back up. “Get up! I can’t lift you by myself” as she attempts to get me to stand.

After a bit of struggle, I do manage to stand up, “Here you go, that chair over there probably best you sit in it.” She sagely advises me.

The chair! Oh yeah, that beast tripped me! I savagely right the demonic chair and sit beside it, not trusting to its devilish ways.

With a thump, I am now on my butt on the floor holding my head between my knees and whispering for that damn midget to stop trying to pound his way out of inside my head!

“Well, that will do for now she says approvingly.” She places an envelope on my desk and looks back at me. Sigh… she lets out some breath, “Hope ye will be feeling better later, “ she giggles again, smiles pleasantly at me snoring, gently closes the door as not to wake me, and marches smartly back the way she came, but this time with a grin on her face that caused most folks to simply blink at the beauty of it.

Sometime later, I awake to the most awful taste in my mouth, like raw onions with doses of, what? Really don’t know. My head is still pounding, but this time it is like rocks rolling around in an empty, metal ore hopper.

I look around, why the hell am I on the floor? Confused and dismayed, I get up and about that time, my head spins, or is it the world spinning? Sitting in the chair next to me, as to not fall, I try to blink away the spinning sensation and figure out what happened.

Looking around I realize I am in my room, good. How I got here is a mystery. And still a mystery, what did I do? Memory being fleeting and fickle, bits and pieces start to come, jumbling or more like it, clamoring for attention!

Holding my head with my hands I try to sort out the conflicting images… Ah yes, that damned, no triple damned Baxter! Those drinks he got me to down, Devil May Care shots! Sigh, did I win? I probably did not.

My head stops its pounding and the room slowly returns to a normal, non-spinning state, suddenly my eyes focus onto an envelope, resting on my desk. Hmmm… That wasn’t there before, wonder what it is. Glancing at the clock which has 8:12 pm displayed, I grab the envelope and open it.

Damn it all to hell! A message from HQ! Time received was 1:50 pm! That was over 7 hours ago! Wait!? Two days ago! What day is this? Quickly looking back at the onerous clock, I see the date. Somewhere I lost a day, and from the state of my room, which looks like a battle zone, prove I was missing in action for at least a day.

Sigh… note to self; never get into a drinking contest with that quadrupled damned Baxter!

After getting my eyes to focus again, I begin reading the message which states, basically, we are to have another Clan War contest, but this time with a twist. Suddenly, that little midget in my head is at it again, joyfully pounding on the inside of my head with that thrice damned sledge!

Specialists!!? Why of all things… I finish reading it and re-read it many times to get an understanding of it, specialists.

I also realize my jump suit is on, jumpsuit? Why am I wearing my pilot’s jumpsuit and it is inside out too. I hope no one seen that! What did I do? Also realizing whatever it is must be all over the base, yesterday!

Why is this chair grinning evilly at me? Shaking my head and rubbing my temples to help clear the banging noise and to stop the spinning again. I stand up quickly to get out of the chair and then the jumpsuit and go to take a hot shower. Hopefully that will clear my head and make me feel better.

Closing the door to my room, I walk slowly and exit the barracks (not fast now, head still spinning and pounding but nowhere near as bad as it was before) and towards the Hangar.

“HALLOOO COMMANDER!” a sudden and close by yell which starts my head to pound again and the sky to start flipping, yells Captain Baxter with a lot of humor and smiles.

“Not so loud! Damn ye! What was in those drinks?” I ask commandingly.

“That was two days ago!” Laughing Captain says. “And ye don’t really want to know too.”

“Why are ye not vomiting, world spinning, and midget pounding condition as I?” I ask wonderingly.

“Well, there is a secret, but ye never get it!” He says cryptically. “I hear we got a message from HQ.” Baxter, changing the subject, is asking with a lot of mirth in his voice.

“Yes, true, that we did.” I reply mysteriously but not forgetting his impish look.

“Well?” he asks impatiently, following me as I am walking to the hangar. I stop and turn to him.

“Get all the Mecha serviced, I mean all of them!” I order suddenly. “I will explain this later, but ye have a mountain of work to do, this is not like anything we done before. Ye will have more work than ye can ever know!” I say confidently.

“But what is it?” He asks again.

“What? Oh, we are to have another Clan War, but this time, with specialists.” I reply remotely, thinking on a sudden image to mind of Jasmine smiling at me, what a beautiful image! However, it too dreamlike to be real for her to ever have a smile like that!

“Eh, come again!” Captain Baxter says, noticing my distracted thinking.

“You heard it, a specialist’s clan war!”

“Gods, what are they thinking!” replies Baxter, suddenly realizing what I meant, “Gods no!”

Laughing and heading over to the communications room in the Hangar and leaving a horrified Hangar Captain behind.

Serves you right, ye old battle axe! Getting me to drink into oblivion, HA!
Grabbing the mic near a startled technician.

“Listen up, this is Commander Kelley speaking, muster all squad clan commanders and squad pilots in the briefing room at 21:00 hours, today!” as the message sweeps through the Hangar and beyond to all who can hear.

Chuckling still over the horrified look on Captain Baxter, I place the mic down in its holder and march off to the briefing room. Along the way, I happen to pass Jasmine. She smartly salutes me and I return her salute which she smiles, that same smile I remembered.

What? I don’t recall anything recent about her, but she has that exact same smile. Confused, and bewildering as it is, it also sent away that damned headache and spinning sensation. Women!

Sigh… Entering the briefing room I wait for the clan commanders and pilots to appear. After fifteen minutes, the clan commanders, their squad pilots as well as mine, muster.

Looking around I see a whole lot of snickering and knowing grins. Gods, what else did I do?

“Okay, ye bastards! Listen up!” I suddenly order, angrily.

After getting their collective attention and seeing those stupid grins fade.

“Why I summoned you all here is that I am to inform you of a decision you all have to make.” I say mysteriously.

“But first off, the message we received from HQ informs me that there will be a Clan War upcoming.” I say contentedly.

Murmurs erupt from everywhere in the room as well as speculation and odds on our prospects of victory.

“Silence!” I say angrily.

“However, let me continue, this Clan War will be different from those in the past. This upcoming Clan War will be conducted as specialists’ format style.” I say finally.

All is quiet as everyone begins to understand what I said. Confused looks abound and folks are whispering amongst each other to get clarification.

I continue, “Each clan must have a minimum of six different specialists or their specialists will be chosen randomly to meet the minimum. Once a specialist is selected by the clan’s leader, me, they defend in that role to where the attacker must match that pilot’s specialist style.” I say informatively.

“I now put to you all a vote, after ye read the rules, do we enter this insanity, or do we continue on as if nothing happened?” I ask questioningly.

I had put up on the display over head the rules and specialist styles this Clan War going to use, and the date all this begins.

“Sounds interesting,” Bryan B. says aloud, “I am in!” He states suddenly.

“This could be fun!” mentions Burning Steel, “I in!”

I sigh as most of the other Clan Squad Commanders respond approvingly to this Clan War format.

“All right, seems like most of you are interested then,” I say sadly, “Study these styles of combat and get back with me after looking over all your Mecha, their gear and weapons, and tell me what ‘Specialist’ ye want to be assigned to you.” I say with authority.

“That is all, dismissed!”

It suddenly erupted with many questions and arguments in the briefing room, no one at the moment interested in leaving but I. I return to my room, thinking of the rules and digging out my current Mecha line up and specs. What specialist shall I run? We have a few weeks to get everything organized and finalized. Can we do this, I wonder? I shrug and begin my mental calculations as to the lineup formation specialist I will go with.

The time flew by amazingly fast, many new weapons were requisitioned, gear upgraded and Mecha repaired. Captain Baxter was totally beside himself and had no time what so ever to gloat about his drinking victory. Good! That bastard deserved this! I decided to go with something different and new with my line up, being victorious recently with a 400 ton lineup formation in a competition event, I will go with a 600 ton style. I am also noted for being a monster and victorious in several other types of combat formation styles in past competitions. As I ponder those implications, perhaps my eventual foes will realize this too.

I scrapped long ago my light weight mecha to give my ever increasing Hangar room for the bigger ones. Maybe that was a mistake, but not holding onto that thought, I go over my 600 ton set up. What I came up with will do nicely!

I finally get from Clan Squad Commanders their final specialist styles, though a few opted to not inform me in time. I assign them the different ‘Weapons’ specialist to cover bases. Smurf Brigade is now ready! I enter us into the Clan War XVII Specialist competition and await the first of our opponents.

When the day came, excitement was so thick you can cut it with a dull butter knife. Our first opponent is to be ‘Samuri Mecha’ a renowned group of experts that we tangled with last time.

Also observing the whole division we are in the rest of potential foes I discover a very important thing, Chessmen 99th not one of them! Those guys are the elite of the elite, very hard to get wins against. They are in another division, good; perhaps they will get someone as last time to be a decent challenge!

Scanning the rosters of the strongest opponents that will potentially take gold, I see that we have a very real chance at it. I inform my Clan of the situation and prospects, warning not to get overly excited. We still have to battle! They responded very excitedly and looked extremely confident!

Samuri Mecha proved to be as stiff an opponent as before, unpredictable and sly. But in the end, we prevailed with a solid victory! It was the specialists’ methods everyone seems to be confused with, attacking 20 ton without having 20 ton mecha, easy wins! That won’t last long for next battle, I think everyone will have gotten a better understanding of the rules.

The next opponent was Ghost Bear Clan. They have assigned a lot of 35 ton specialists, damn it all! I do not have those anymore in sufficient numbers to pose a threat to them. Have to ignore those and get wins the hard way!

We won handedly, though Ghost Bears didn’t really counter attack much. Not sure their strategy but a win is a win!

And finally, our opponent to fight for Gold is Rabid Bunny Surfers RV Clan. Great, they have higher level folks and most are specialists, weapon types! This is going to be rough! When the battle started, a member of their clan was fierce in his opening attacks but not sure that he was paying attention to the defender rules.

As I usually instruct my members to take on those they think they can win but only watching battle grid replays of previous clashes. I say to them is to understand what they have and do! My members pretty much followed that and did not give up but several defensive wins, however, our foe gave out many, many defensive wins for us!

I analyzed the battle data and realized if they were a bit more frugal in attacking, they could have won if they didn’t give up all those defensive wins. As time clicked by, and finally, the battle ended, we won!

We at last have gotten gold in the Clan Wars XVII – Specialist Style Format. Great cheering all around and great work to all involved, Hangar Captain Baxter finally getting rest…

“……..SKKKISHHHREEEEEeee…….” the intercom speakers rang with a horrible sounding noise!

“..SKKnnn..DUUUAWWOOAYY….sniiinkkkshizzzzerzzz…”, again that noise, but something not quite intelligible is starting to come through, a human like image but definitely not human, begins to speak.

“Humans…. You All Must Submit to me, Drohchah oh- Thyehgr, or die…..zzZZinnngzzipsh…”

Transmission ended as abruptly as it started.

Silence pervaded the room. Everyone is looking at each other in wonder.

Captain Baxter turning pale, “Was that a ‘Forerunner’?” he asks quietly.

“How did it get our communications frequency?” asked a technician nearby.

“Who is that or is this a joke?” Burning Steel says aloud.

Suddenly I get a buzzing noise coming from my commanders Q-Link Communicator. Only the HQ or people above me have access to that! I grab it out of my pocket and look at the display. Reading the orders there; Command has just informed me that it was NOT a hoax; he is for real, a forerunner returned! Also the message says get ready for a long battle, he is invading the systems recently opened up.

I gasp in surprise; those systems are the source of the new and mysterious Ignis and Aspis mecha!

HQ also gives me the Nexus Gate Key coordinates and activation code to fight on an unknown system that now has a lot of this so called forerunner activity.

I order all pilots to the briefing room. Looking at Captain Baxter, shaking my head, I tell him what is yet to come.

Quietly he says, “May the Gods favor us!”

I look back at the now blank display panel, wondering what a Forerunner can do; time is all that one has had and now? Why?

Damn thing is the colour of my hangover…..

Play: Mecha
Play on FaceBook:
Read all news:
Get Free Niodes: Submit your story

Review of the T-9 Tsunami By Joseph Forsithe

Love these missiles! When i put it on my Ignis, I fork and spew damage all over the place. Its damage is 70 its speed is slow at 80 but it has a fork at 60%. A few well placed shots from these and you will be picking up scrap remains of your foes. These missiles will go great on any mech but are for missile mechs really. When i get my Rook, it will have many of these.

T9 Berserker

Play: Mecha
Play on FaceBook:
Read all news:
Get Free Niodes: Submit your story

All reports here were written by players of Mecha Galaxy.
Get Free Niodes -- Submit your story